Overwhelmed? Don’t follow your instincts..

I read a recent statistic that stated that 2/3 of today’s employees feel “overwhelmed”.  I have to say in my experience of talking with clients from all walks of life and work, it sounds about right.  The article blamed this truth on the proliferation of technology and the breakdown of barriers between and work and our larger lives.  I spend a fair amount of time helping people strategize how they might restore that balance.  But I think the more useful conversation centers around what that sense of overwhelming can do to your effectiveness; particularly your productivity and problem-solving skills.  In the dictionary the word “overwhelm” is defined as to overpower or crush.  Unfortunately, that is a perfect description of what that feeling can do to our effectiveness.

When we are overwhelmed we do one of two things, we become paralyzed and shut down, withdraw and stop communicating. Or, we make rash decisions about our priorities and do something, anything to get a sense of momentum hoping to escape this place, this feeling. The results are the same… mistakes, missed deadlines on key tasks and/or poor quality work.  And the consequence of those things are of course, never good.  Afterwards, upon reflection, we may still feel the same sense of complete despair. After all, what else could we have done under such overwhelming circumstances?

We’ve all been there!  So what does mindfulness have to do with any of this?  Here’s what I have observed about truly successful people. I am talking about those few unflappable sorts who seem to slide through tough times with their sanity and reputations completely intact. They resist their emotional instincts (because they know they are impaired when they are feeling overwhelmed) and they focus on making good rational choices.  Good choice-making requires that you redirect your compass away from that emotional response (which is some blend of fear, exhaustion, anger and challenged self-esteem) and into a rational, analytical and data-driven response zone.

If you are to develop rational strategies, your strategies will need to match your emotional triggers.  Here are three common emotional triggers for feeling “overwhelmed”.

#1 Mt. Overwhelm  

When you feel like the task is beyond you… or as the Irish like to say you are “not able for it”.  It is too big, too scary, too daunting or a dead on perfect match for your Achille's Heel.  Your instinct is to procrastinate and avoid this task allowing it to worry you and keep you from being effective on anything else you might be doing. Here is where you need think small.  Narrow your focus on that task and make a mindful decision to break it into the smallest possible chunks. If it still seems too big, keep hacking at until you see something that resembles a plan emerging.  Sequence those tasks in an order that makes sense, not what you would like to do first, not what you can do easily.  But rather choose an order that makes good rational sense. Set goals and timelines for getting the steps underway.  Obviously, you should also consider who else you can involve.  It may be that delegation starts to make sense when the tasks are small and defined. This will start to quell your stress reaction.  The act of planning pushes the task into your thinking brain moving it from your emotional brain. 

Then, get moving. Even if you feel you cannot afford the time it takes to address the first steps… take them anyway.  Address them as efficiently as you can, but no shortcuts. The early steps always build a foundation for success. Rushing on the front end almost always costs you time and effectiveness by the time you are done.

This may sound simple and obvious and it is. Unfortunately, it’s what we forget to remember when we are feeling overwhelmed.   

# 2  The Habitrail   

Another kind of overwhelming occurs when we feel powerless.  When we have that sense that we are on a hamster wheel going round and round and we find ourselves in the same situation over and over again. Round and round with no way off, creating that sense of powerlessness.  Your instinct here might be to avoid dealing with the longer term, you are too upset and exhausted to think big picture so you might just try to get through what you need to today. These are the times when we need to broaden our focus.  I like this book titled 9 Things You Simply Must Do, by Dr. Henry Cloud.  He describes this strategy as “Play the Movie”. Stop your auto-pilot response and think about your actions before you act and think in a longer term context. Will this get you to a different place?  Is this response contributing to this pattern? He says, “Any one thing you do is only a scene in a larger movie. To understand that action, you have to play it out all the way to end of that movie.” Think about the cause and effect…if I do this, then what will happen? Then what will happen? Then what will happen?  Try to go at least three steps out.   Forcing this reasoning will subdue your rash or emotional impulses, keeping you from any familiar poor choices. 

#3 The Waterfall

If your overwhelming comes from a sense that there is just too much, you are underwater and you can’t ever catch your breath, your instinct might be to hunker down or get busy without thinking your choices through.  You might that imagine if you just work harder or later you will be able to catch up. Instead consider..What are the high impact items?  Who are the stakeholders?  What has the biggest impact if I drop the ball?  Don’t withdraw. Don’t stop communicating. Those are powerless and emotional responses.   Assign a realistic time estimate to everything on your plate and sequence them by importance and impact.  Communicate your decisions on priorities and ask for input from bosses and internal customers.  When you communicate and “vet” your choices, you share the risk associated with these decisions. Bosses are consistently challenged by employees who come to them overwhelmed and wringing their hands with the “I need help prioritizing” mantra. I am suggesting something very different.  This is more like… “I have thought about the impact of these tasks and I think this is the best use of my time.  This means some items are going to slip so I wanted you to take a look at that before I move forward with this approach”.   It’s operating from a high functioning position. 

If we stay with what is familiar or habit, we will likely fuel the pattern of outcomes that frustrated us in the first place.  Place a longer term context on your priority setting. Ask yourself, what matters most and what could hurt you most if you don’t deal with it? 

Pull the emergency brake, think about your next response, then take the steering wheel and steer in a thoughtful direction. Guess what?.. Now you are driving.  Any decisions you make here will help you to feel less powerless. After careful analysis, you may choose to stay in your current mode, for today and there may be good rationale for that.  But even then, it isn’t happening to you anymore, it is happening because you decided to stay in that place, for now.  And you have some solid ideas about what you may do differently tomorrow.  Wayne Dyer has a nice quote that says, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”.

So mindfulness is the antidote for overwhelm.  The next time you feel that emotional “crush”

1. Slow your thoughts
2. Employ your rational brain
3. Decide whether you need to narrow your focus or think bigger picture (or both)
4. Take the wheel and START STEERING!

image credit: Fotosearch.com